Wings of Grief: Mother starts support group for families

Published 7:00 am Wednesday, February 10, 2016

love of dance: Tori Odom was a member of the Jr. Blue Angels dance team.  Photo submitted

love of dance: Tori Odom was a member of the Jr. Blue Angels dance team.
Photo submitted

Sixteen years ago, a unique individual was welcomed into the world. Everyone called her Tori.
Tragically, on Nov. 15, 2015, the girl, her mother Toni Farmer describes as spunky and sassy, breathed her last breath surrounded by family and friends.
“She was my best friend and a typical teenager,” Farmer said. “But when it came down to it, she was a good respectful person and did anything she could to help.”
The Pearl River Central High School ninth grader was a social butterfly, her mother said. She never met a stranger, no matter race or nationality, she loved everyone.
“She was well-loved by many,” Farmer said. “She loved to hunt and fish, she was a normal country bumpkin. She loved to sing and dance and was a member of the PRC Jr. Blue Angels. She also had many types of facial expressions; you never knew what type of face she would make. She could hate you one minute and love you the next.”
Tori dreamed of attending the University of Mississippi and becoming a pediatric nurse and dance instructor, Farmer said.
On Nov. 13, 2015, Tori was involved in a car accident, which left her family with a difficult decision.
“I knew it was the right one,” Farmer said. “It was hard to let go, but her little body was broken. Had she lived, it would have been a long and miserable life. God saw her getting tired. She was a true Christian and devoted to God. The minute she took her last breath, I knew where she was.”
Tori loved blue hearts and, while hospitalized, Farmer noticed her daughter had drawn a blue heart on her ankle.
All family members have a blue heart tattoo and Farmer has two, one in the same spot Tori drew hers and another on her hand.
“As a mother, I miss her greatly, but on the same hand, I’m jealous as she is suffering no more,” Farmer said. “She is the happiest she has been. I get by daily knowing she’s in heaven without pain.”
During her search for a local support group, Farmer found a few groups on Facebook, but found she needed a more person-to-person interaction.
Several people approached Farmer and encouraged her to start a support group.
“I didn’t know what they were thinking, but I did some serious thinking and praying about it,” she said. “Last Friday, I received a text from my aunt who told me I had been on her heart and that the group was something I should do.”
Farmer named her support group Wings of Grief and plans to host the first meeting on Feb. 20 at 5 p.m. at 121 Ivy St., Carriere.
During this first meeting, Farmer plans to discuss with attendees a prime day for everyone to meet.
Once a month, she wants families to come together so siblings can share their feelings with other siblings.
Wings of Grief is open to parents and families in Pearl River County suffering from the loss of a child.
“We’re not just getting together to grieve, but find new friends,” Farmer said. “It’s a journey of a new life that we were unfortunately given. I want us to come together as one, relate, and know what each other is going through.”
Learn more about Wings of Grief through Facebook and for more information contact Farmer at 601-337-9915 and at
As of Tuesday, Farmer said 33 members had joined the Facebook group.
“Everybody is stating that this is awesome and much needed for Pearl River County,” Farmer said. “I know Tori would want me to do this.”

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