Archived Story

Find the strength to let go

Published 7:00am Friday, June 27, 2014

Sometimes, I find, it’s hard to let go.

Of nothing in particular, just of things we get our hearts or minds set on — something we wanted, some plan we made for ourselves that fate (or the universe, or the good Lord) wouldn’t have.

I think it’s a defense mechanism. Something inside us feels an onslaught of disappointment leering in the distance as our plans unravel and grabs tighter in fear of what awaits us.

If only we had enough forethought in our actions to see that holding on doesn’t protect us from anything. Somehow, in our neglect, it becomes the root of the damage that’s created.

Wouldn’t it be nice to move on more easily, to not hold grudges? What would it take to make that change?

I can forgive actions. That’s easy. My hang up is in the fact that I find it much harder to forgive character.

This is wrong. Please don’t be like me.  “Forgive and forget”, that’s the motto to strive after.

I recently stumbled across a proverb, of sorts, to put things in perspective: A psychologist raised a glass of water to a group of students and asks, “How heavy is this glass of water?”

Answers varied, then she replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. For a minute, it’s not a problem. An hour, and I’ll have an ache in my arm. For a day, and my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”

Remember to put the glass down.

Sometimes that’s all the forethought it takes.

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